Tightrope
by EllaNight
Summary: Countdown (3x17) AU from when Castle defuses the bomb. "She isn't thinking when she lets her feet carry her across the small distance separating them; she just acts on pure, raw instinct, wrapping her arms around his neck once more, only this time she pulls him down and captures his lips with hers."
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: A huge thanks to Anja for the prompt and the talented Chelsea once again for the beautiful cover art. I hope you guys enjoy this fic. There will be five chapter total; the first two will be rated T but everything after that will be in M rated territory. Thank you for reading, I'd love to have your thoughts!**

* * *

 _Some people long for a life that is simple and planned  
Tied with a ribbon  
Some people won't sail the sea 'cause they're safer on land  
To follow what's written  
But I'd follow you to the great unknown  
Off to a world we call our own_

 _Hand in my hand and we promised to never let go_

 _We're walking the tightrope_

 _-_ Tightrope, The Greatest Showman

* * *

She stares at him, his eyes just as terrified as she imagines hers look right about now, doesn't know what else to do as she holds on to his hand, clinging to him literally for dear life as they have about five seconds left to live before the bomb goes off and blows New York City to ash.

She sees him reach forward towards the open doors of the van and she ducks, turns away from the source of the expected explosion, her heart pounding against the wall of her chest harder than it ever has before, jabbing at her insides as panic settles deep in her bones-

He yanks at the wires and recoils, squeezing his eyes shut as he waits for the blow that never comes. Her eyes blink open after a moment and she watches as he looks back at the bomb in the van, the bright red timer at zero, but the rest of it is no different than it had been a minute before. Everything stands the same.

It didn't blow.

Castle drops the handful of wires he pulled from the explosive and a sob climbs up her throat when she exhales a long shuddering breath.

"Castle," she sighs out his name, throwing herself into his arms, not even ashamed of the ragged sound of pure relief that makes it past her lips when he pulls her in tight, his arms coiling around her waist and clinging just as tightly. He laughs, euphoric as he pulls away, and she gulps in another breath, hadn't realized she'd seriously depraved her lungs of air when she thought they were seconds away from being blown to pieces like the rest of the city. She pivots to look at the bomb again, still can't believe her eyes when she sees it there, intact. Kate brings a hand up to rake her fingers through her hair. Her head is pounding, body still trembling in fear, hasn't caught up to the fact that she's not about to die and she lets out a startling laugh when she sees Castle rub his hands over his face and point out at the bomb in victory.

"Yes!" He shouts, still can't seem to believe that he just defused a high-end explosive by pulling out the wires. Adrenaline continues to pump through her veins, her heart still racing, though not as painfully as it was moments before but he has her smiling and she isn't thinking when she lets her feet carry her across the small distance separating them; she just acts on pure, raw instinct, wrapping her arms around his neck once more, only this time she pulls him down and captures his lips with hers.

She's been thinking about his mouth for weeks, ever since their kiss in that alley. It was supposed to be nothing but a ruse, just a distraction for the guard – it's what she's been repeating to herself over and over every night when she closes her eyes and continues to be haunted by the memory of his devastating kiss.

He groans in surprise but doesn't pull away, tugs her in closer as his hands fist in the material of her coat, gripping her waist and she offers no resistance, revels in the heat his body emanates even through layers of clothing. Kate weaves her fingers through his hair, wishes she didn't have her gloves on so she could feel the softness under her fingers. She moans when he sucks her bottom lip into his mouth, laves it with his tongue after nipping it with his teeth and she lets her lower body grind down on the thigh he slips between her legs. The sweet friction sends flames licking up her spine and _god_ , she wants him, has wanted him for so _long_ and she sighs at the thought. He takes advantage of her open mouth to tangle his tongue with hers, drawing her body in, closer still-

"One-Lincoln-Forty, are you guys okay? ETA one minute." The crackling voice coming from the radio attached to her hip startles them apart. She recognizes the woman's voice from dispatch on the walkie-talkie and turns away from Castle who looks just as stunned as she does. Biting down on her bottom lip, she pulls the device up to her mouth.

"Dispatch, this is One-Lincoln-Forty, I think we managed to diffuse the bomb. We're okay."

She sighs and closes her eyes, still turned away from Castle and she can practically feel his eyes on her, waiting for her to say something.

Only, she doesn't know what to say. She doesn't know what _happened_. She just-

She kissed him. This wasn't his crazy idea, or a distraction tactic and while she may have been hit with a massive wave of adrenaline, she's the one who reached for him and initiated that kiss. There's no way she can deny it, not even to herself.

God, what was she even _thinking_? She has a boyfriend who just turned down a job to Haiti to be with her and she thought she was happy about that, thought it meant they had a chance of making things work.

But they never really stood a chance, did they? Not when the man standing right behind her, waiting for her to turn around and say something already has a piece of her heart.

Kate turns to face him and her heart stutters at the gentle smile lining his lips, the glimmer of hope in his eyes. She lets the corners of her mouth curl upward, taking a small step towards him.

"Castle-"

She's interrupted before she can even start by the ringing of her phone, recognizes Fallon's number across the screen and she knows she has to pick up. She gives Castle an apologetic look but she can see he understands. They did just stop the city from being blown to smithereens and she needs to inform her colleagues of what's happened.

* * *

He's disappointed when they don't get to ride back to the precinct alone together. He was looking forward to it, thought it would be the perfect moment to talk about what the hell happened after he stopped the bomb from going off. They drive Nazihah back to the precinct seeing as she was driving the van, but the bomb squad took hold of the vehicle. The ride is awkward and strained, his mind constantly flashing back to the way she pulled him in and kissed him, the way her body had listed into his, how she'd undulated against his hips. It has him clearing his throat more than once as he tries to dispel the images from his mind, focus on something else until they can talk about this properly.

He already knows it's no use. If he thought the soft moan she'd made during their first kiss was enough to fill his fantasies, he'd been wrong. He wants her now more than ever, more than he thought possible, and not just for a night. It's always been for more than just a night with her. He needs her to know that, needs her to know that he's pretty certain he's in love with her.

Shit, he is _so_ screwed.

They give their statements when they arrive at the precinct, and then Montgomery is ushering their team into one of the conference rooms, offering them beers and claiming they all deserve it after the day they've had when Castle shoots him an inquisitive look. He shrugs and accepts the drinks from their captain: he can't argue with that.

They sit around the table and even though it's been over two hours since the whole thing went down, he still feels on edge, like he hasn't quite managed to catch his breath since the scare. Kate telling the story of how he managed to save them out of sheer luck helps though, has him smiling and leaning back against his chair, a little more relaxed.

"You know, the mayor wants to give you guys a medal," Montgomery informs them, pride in his eyes as he looks between the two of them. "I didn't have the heart to tell him you didn't have a clue what you were doing." Rick chuckles and the rest of them laugh. It's true, he really didn't know what the hell he was doing but he's so damn glad it worked.

"Captain's right," Espo pipes up when the laughter dies down. "You guys don't know how lucky you are."

He knows what Espo means, what he's trying to say, but he doesn't think it's true. He looks over at Kate, the smile fading from her lips as a more somber expression crosses her features and he thinks her mind takes her back to those few seconds before they thought they were going to die.

"Actually, I do," Rick counters, can't help the fact that the words ring true for so much more than just their survival. He may have inadvertently saved New York today, but he also got to kiss the woman who's haunted his dreams for longer than he can remember. Not just because of how beautiful she looks, or how she captures the rooms attention when she walks in. No, it's so much more than that now. It's because of how she's captivated him for years with her wit, her passion and fierce intellect; the way she keeps him on his toes and makes him want to be a better man. And he thinks they might finally get their shot.

So yeah, he thinks he knows just how lucky he is. He looks back at Kate, his lips curling upward when he sees her looking back at him with a shy smile.

He doesn't have time to say anything more before Fallon knocks on the door of the conference room, asking to talk with him and Beckett. He ends up thanking them and Castle finds himself thinking that maybe he's not such a bad guy underneath the front he puts up in order to compartmentalize and do his job. He has to agree with his partner though, he kind of hopes they don't have to work together again, if only for the fact that he doesn't ever want to get that close to a bomb again.

"Hey, if it does happen again, maybe you could just text me. Have a code word: run," Castle says, only half joking as Fallon walks away. He turns back towards Kate with a sigh but happy to see at least his attempt at a joke made her smile. It hasn't been around very often this past week, but he hasn't stopped trying to catch a glimpse of the white flash of her teeth, the crinkles around her eyes when her lips lift up, despite the severity of their case.

"Hell of a day, huh?"

"Hell of a day," she echoes, nodding and the can't help but notice how the royal blue of her sweater brings out the green and the stream of gold in her eyes. His mind flashes back to the flame surrounding her irises a few hours earlier, when she pulled him in for a kiss there's no way he could ever forget.

He can't help the way his gaze darts down to her lips, wishes he could taste her again right then and there and he thinks he sees the faintest hitch her in breathing, like maybe she's thinking about it too.

But they need to talk first because he needs to know what this all means, where it leaves them and if she really wants this.

"Do you think we could talk?" He asks, can hear the hope in his voice, and he really hopes he doesn't sound pathetic. He just wants to do this right. It takes her a second to answer but just when he's starting to panic, thinking he's gone about this all wrong, that he's managed to mess things up before they could even begin, he sees her nod shyly, tilting her head towards the interrogation room.

He smiles so wide his cheeks ache and he takes a step forward but the call of her name has his blood running cold.

"Katie," Josh calls, walking over to them and his chest tightens, his insides twisting and churning uncomfortably.

"Josh," Kate turns, apparently surprised to have him show up at the precinct and the burn of jealousy flares hotly in the pit of his stomach when he pulls her in close for a hug.

He waits for her to say something, to pull away but Kate returns the other man's embrace despite her surprise to see him. God, how could he have been so _stupid_?

Did he really manage to delude himself into believing that she'd leave her life-saving, motorcycle-riding, perfect boyfriend for him? If he's being honest, he hadn't even thought about Josh; he'd managed to conveniently forget about the fact that she wasn't free to even begin anything with him at all.

"I didn't know you were coming over?"

"I texted you earlier. Thought I'd surprise you since you didn't answer," Josh answers, shrugging and pulling her in close, tucking her into his side.

He realizes he's been staring at them, just standing there this whole time and the moment of self-awareness makes him feel like a fool.

Kate doesn't answer Josh's words but when she turns back to him, her words stab at his already punctured heart.

"Castle, could you just give us a minute?" she asks, her tone edging on something that sounds like pity and it sends a bucket of cold water down his spine, sobering him up. She doesn't want him. She's choosing Josh.

He knows how to put on a poker face, to act like nothing gets to him. Years of watching his mother on stage and a career involving faked smiles has taught him that at least.

"Of course," he says through gritted teeth, ignores the way his chest clenches tightly, or how a small voice in the back of his mind urges him to stay and fight for her. "I was just heading home anyway."

He turns on his heels, doesn't look back to give her or her boyfriend a chance to respond as he heads towards the elevator, the remains of his bruised and battered heart bleeding in his hands.


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: Wow! I am overwhelmed by all the love you guys have shown the first chapter! Thank you so much for reading, and I hope you enjoy this update. - Zoe**

* * *

Confusion and hurt swarm her insides at the sight of Castle turning away from her without a second glance and heading for the elevator.

Josh showing up at the precinct had taken her by surprise and she hadn't had time to think properly about how to react, how to handle things.

If anything had been clear after today though, it was that she and Josh wouldn't work and she owed it to him to let him go.

She'd asked Castle to give them a minute, intending on taking Josh into the break room and explaining that she just couldn't do this anymore. It wasn't how she would have preferred to break things off with him, but she didn't want to string him along, couldn't continue denying that her heart fluttered and yearned for someone else.

But she hadn't expected Castle to leave. Her heart clenches in her chest, a vice grip that has her hand rising to rub at the skin between her breasts as she watches the elevator doors close around him. Why would he leave? He had asked her to talk and she'd said yes, she just-

It wasn't her fault that Josh had shown up. All he'd had to do was give her a few minutes.

"Ready to head home?" Josh asks, oblivious to her inner turmoil, squeezing her shoulder and she takes a step out of his embrace. She'd hated the look on Castle's face when her boyfriend had pulled her into his arms. She hadn't wanted to hurt him, had wanted to break up with Josh as painlessly as she could manage, so she'd let him band his arms around her, had tentatively returned his embrace in an attempt to comfort.

It was clear that Castle hadn't seen it that way, and as soon as she'd seen the pain in his eyes, the soft tones of betrayal surrounding his irises, she knew she'd made a mistake not to pull away.

She thought he'd understand when she asked him to give her and Josh a moment, that he knew she'd be coming right back to him, tried to express her apology for leaving him there to wait for a few minutes in her gaze but she's pretty sure he'd read her wrong.

And now she stands with Josh in the middle of the precinct and her chest feels like it's been torn open.

"Kate?" Josh calls her name when she doesn't answer, and she remembers that he asked her if she wanted to go home.

It doesn't take her long to decide to go with her original plan, even if Castle is gone and he now wants nothing to do with her. She'll go to him, try to explain and-

She'll figure something out.

But before that, she needs to face the daunting conversation that will likely deeply hurt the man behind her, because no matter how things turn out with Castle, she knows that Josh is definitely not her home, not the one she wants to dive in with. Staying in this relationship any longer just isn't fair to him, nor her for that matter. Not when all she can think about is the ghost of another man's lips on hers, the way her body lit up like a flame at the touch of his tongue and the way his fingers had tangled loosely in her hair a few hours earlier.

Kate doesn't answer, takes one of his hands and guides Josh into the break room, letting go to close the door behind him and she keeps a decent amount of space between them when she turns back to face him. She can see the questions and confusion in his eyes.

"I think you should go to Haiti," she blurts out, looking up from the floor until their gazes meet and hurt flashes across his face.

"What do you mean? I stayed here for you, to spend more time together. I thought it's what you wanted," he counters, annoyance and resentment in his voice.

"I thought it's what I wanted too," she admits, the implication clear as day but he spells it out for her anyway.

"And it's not what you want anymore?" He asks, getting angry now and she knows she doesn't have the right to be upset with him. She's the one who messed up here and he deserves to be angry with her.

"This is about him isn't it?" he spits out and Josh doesn't have to say his name because they both know who he's talking about. Her silence gives him all the confirmation he needs.

"I'm sorry," she whispers, and she means it, she never meant to hurt Josh with any of this.

"Save it," he says harshly. "I hope you guys are happy together," he says, his voice dripping with sarcasm and he heads for the door of the break room, lets it slam shut behind him. She lets him go.

Kate lets her head fall into her hands as she leans forward against the counter top, exhaling a long breath. She wishes things could have been different, that she would have handled it all better because somehow, she's managed to hurt everyone she tried to protect tonight.

She knew hurting Josh was inevitable despite her noble intentions to set him free, but she had never meant to hurt Castle, to send him running with the thought that she'd once again chosen someone else over him.

God, they haven't even had a chance to begin anything and she's already managed to screw things up. The look of hurt she'd seen him wear flashes behind her eyes and she straightens up from the counter with renewed determination. It's her turn to go to him, to demand that he listen. He's been the driver in this unconventional working relationship of theirs, always pushing for more until she eventually gave into him.

And she's the one who pulled him in for a fiery kiss today despite the fact that she was in a committed relationship. She owes him an explanation and they need to have that talk.

Kate heads for her desk, only to grab her coat from behind her chair and slips it on quickly, walking briskly towards the stairs. He doesn't get to just walk away, not this time.

* * *

Her resolve doesn't dim until her fist is mere inches from his door, hesitating for a fraction of a second, wondering if she's really doing the right thing, the safe thing.

Screw safe.

She doesn't want safe, not anymore, not when it leaves her feeling like an empty shell, when she has to deny and supress the fire licking at her bones at the thought of the man behind the door.

She knows why she keeps her heart shielded, why she's never really put her heart out on the line with any man she's had a relationship with since she was nineteen. She's well acquainted with the cold, hard, stab of grief of losing someone who truly mattered, who held a piece of her heart. But what she's doing now, it's not living, not what her mother would have wanted for her.

Offering herself up to the one man who has managed to ignite something in her that burns far brighter than the dull embers her past relationships have elicited terrifies her. The fear of falling, of hanging over a precipice is daunting, paralyzing, but she wills herself to take the jump, to trust that Castle will do his best not to let them fall.

Her knuckles rap against the hardwood of his door three times and her heart lurches in her chest.

She waits with bated breath. God, she hopes he's home, that she didn't just work herself up to coming over here just for him not to answer. She should have called-

The door swings open and she feels her insides clench, grip around her heart and tightening at the sight of him in the same clothes she'd last seen him in at the precinct.

"Beckett." The sharp scrape of her surname falling from his lips sobers her up, hurts a little. It's not nearly as soft as the way the rare use of her first name usually sounds coming from of his mouth, but it reminds her of why she came here to begin with. She owes him an explanation.

"I was thinking maybe we could have that talk?" It's unusual for her to sound so shy, so unsure, but the sentence ends up sounding like a question due to the inflation in her voice.

She sees his eyes widen in surprise but the light surrounding his irises dims a second later. He nods, steps to the side and opens the door wider to let her in but his grim demeanor throws her off. She thought he'd be happy to see her here, that he'd be glad she came to him to talk.

But he looks miserable, like having her show up at his doorstep is an extra weight on his shoulders, an unwelcomed surprise.

It has her second guessing, frustrated, but she walks passed him into his home, raking a hand through her hair as she tries to think of what to say, how not to damage this fragile thing between them any further.

"Martha and Alexis?" She questions, the thought that they might have an audience occurring to her for the first time since she left the precinct.

"Still out of town," he answers as he closes the door and takes a few steps in her direction, keeping far more space between them then she would have hoped. He's deliberately keeping himself at a distance, that much is clear, and the observation has her swallowing hard, fighting against her every instinct to run and forget about taking the risk. The odds seem to be stacking up against her.

She sees him hesitate, unsure of what to do with himself but he settles on walking towards the kitchen island, pushing the sleeves of his dress shirt up his forearms and the simple action has her breath catching. Images of how he'd pulled her against the length of his body, held her to him as he'd sipped from her mouth, desperate and reverent all at once, flood her mind and it fuels something in her. He kissed her back today, he _wanted_ her and that… that couldn't have changed in the span of an hour, right?

But he speaks before she does.

"Thought you'd be home with Josh by now," he mumbles, almost as if against his better judgement, the words tumbling from his mouth without his consent before he can reel them back.

"We talked at the precinct-"

"Kate, you don't have to explain," he cuts her off before she can say anymore and this time, the heat that boils her blood isn't born of lust, but of frustration. God, he can be so _infuriating_ sometimes.

"Actually, I think I do," she insists, walking towards him and circling around the kitchen island he's conveniently positioned between them. She's tired of speaking in subtext. "I didn't want to go home with Josh."

She sees the flare of hope light in his eyes, the lighter shade of cerulean overtaking the deep shadows of indigo at her words and the few steps she takes in his direction. "I was expecting you to stay, Castle."

His gaze hardens, the words and anger building up inside him and good – _finally_ – he's going to say something. "I didn't need to see the two of you getting cozy with each other while I waited my turn, Beckett," he snaps, and she growls at his words, her irritation growing and she takes two final steps that take her right up to him, their noses nearly grazing as they stare each other down, neither willing to look away.

"I wasn't going to cozy up with him," she scoffs, furious that he would even think that after everything that had happened today. "I was going to break up with him so I could come home with you."

Her words stop him short and she can see the complete shift of his stance, his anger deflating, leaving his body entirely, as though blown away by a gust of wind.

"I- I thought-" he sputters, and she can see the wheels in his head turning, trying to see how he misinterpreted the signs, how he got it all so wrong. She swears she can see an apology forming on the tip of his tongue, anguish, regret and supplication in the storm cloud of his eyes, but she doesn't want him to be sorry. She just wants him.

"You thought wrong, Castle," she corrects, cuts him off before he can say anything more and she surges forward, breaching the last remaining distances between them, reaching for him with her hands and slanting her lips over his.

* * *

 _Just to let you guys know I also post updates on Twitter and Tumlbr in case this site fails to send out notifications (which happens way too often)._

 _Twitter: zoe_keller_

 _Tumblr: zkalways_


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Reminder that this chapter and the rest are Rated M. If that's not your cup of tea, then all you need to know is that they had a _really_ good night. **

* * *

He doesn't expect the crash of her lips against his, but his body reacts to hers instantly, worshipping her mouth, his kiss fierce and claiming.

Part of him still can't believe that she's _here_ , that Kate Beckett just showed up at his doorstep after having only just broken up with her boyfriend, asking him to talk. And now she's kissing him, for the second time today.

The thought spurs him on, has heat consuming every inch of his body and his hands move up, one to her cheek while the other slides behind her ear to tangle in the long, silky strands of her hair. She lets out a soft little moan when he angles her head to get better access to her mouth and the sound completely undoes him, has something snapping inside him and suddenly it's not enough. He needs more, needs to feel the lithe lines of her body align with his, wants to taste and kiss and worship every inch of her skin.

 _Fuck._

He just wants her so damn much.

His feet move him forward of their own accord and she follows, stepping back, trusting him to take the lead. She gasps when her back hits the cool metal of his refrigerator, her mouth falling open at the feel of his thigh sliding between hers and he doesn't hesitate to take full advantage, slipping his tongue past her lips to tangle with hers, curling at the roof of her mouth.

She keeps him close, her hands frantic and pulling at the material of his dress shirt until she has enough space to slide her fingers underneath. His abdominal muscles spasm at the brush of her fingers against his skin, the gentle scrape of her nails making their way up higher. He growls as a wave of heat arrows through him, following the trail of her hands and his teeth catch her bottom lip in retaliation.

Whatever blood remained in his brain rushes south when she lets her hands splay at his chest, her thumbs stroking his nipples in a gentle caress and the reverence in her touch has his head spinning, has him thinking that maybe she's thought about this too, about them and how great they could be together.

He needs to show her. She _needs_ to know how amazing he knows they can be.

Castle lets his lips drift away from her mouth, travelling to her cheek and down to the column of her neck, kissing and sucking at the pale skin. He catalogues every moan, every sigh and desperate little sound that falls past her lips, commits them to memory because there's no way he's only spending one night with Kate Beckett in his bed.

He hates that they haven't talked, not really. But they've never really been any good at it anyway. He just needs to show her.

Castle lets his hands fall to her hips, pulling her body into his until he knows for certain she can feel the evidence of his arousal pressing up against her sensitive core. Her lower body undulates against his, grinding down along his thigh and moving up until their pelvis' meet.

"Castle," she sighs his name, breathless with it, and heat spears down his spine.

He groans, biting down at the soft skin just below her ear, not caring that he'll probably leave a mark and he mumbles a low curse at her turtleneck, the way it obstructs his access to the rest of the length of her neck, the sharp ridge of her collarbone he wants to trace with his tongue. Her chest is heaving with every sharp gulp of air she manages to pull into her lungs and god, he wants that uncovered too, wants to feel the warm weight of her breasts in his hands, cover them with his palm, lave his tongue over her puckered nipples.

Fuck it.

Castle drops to his knees, intent on slowly pulling up her shirt and kissing his way up every patch of skin he'd reveal but the moment his knees hit the floor and his face is level with her abdomen, he gets distracted.

He can _smell_ her arousal, a tangy mix of sweetness and spice and he feels himself grow painfully hard within the confines of his pants.

Oh, he needs to taste her. _Now_.

Ignoring his own pressing need, he sets off on a different course than he'd originally planned when coming down here, lifting her shirt up only slightly and pressing his lips below her belly button. Her muscles quiver under his touch and he revels in the effect he has on her, how responsive her body is to his. He feels powerful with it, can't quite believe that Kate is trusting him with her body, placing him in charge of her pleasure.

An oh, he doesn't plan on letting her down.

He looks up and his own insides clench with arousal at the sight of Kate, her head thrown back against his fridge, her mouth open and panting, her eyes screwed shut in pleasure.

He hasn't even properly touched her yet and she's already so lost in the moment, lost in him and his touch and what he's doing to her and he thinks he might decide to make it his sole mission in life to put that look on her face every single day that she'll let him.

Castle brings his hands down from her waist, letting his fingers trail along the lithe plane of her abdomen, taking note of the shiver that travels up her spine before he pops open the button of her pants. He takes his time pulling down the zipper and his hand is so close he can feel the heat radiating from her center, calling for his touch.

"God, Castle, _please_ ," she begs, her voice breathier than he's ever heard it, a touch of desperation, and the feel of her fingers weaving through his hair, holding him close to her nearly sends him spiralling over the edge.

 _Holy shit_ , this woman is going to be the death of him. He doesn't think he's been this close to coming without any tactile stimulation since he was a goddamn teenager. But her… God, Kate just makes him lose it, has him damn near out of his mind with want and still, all he can focus on is making sure that she feels everything just as sharply as he does.

He hooks his thumbs at the edge of her pants and takes care to pull them down slowly, letting the tips of his fingers brush along the back of her thighs as he continues on his path down her legs, but he leaves her panties in place for now – he wants to deal with those separately. Castle picks up each of her feet one at a time and frees her ankles from the tight confines of her pants. His first kiss lands at the top of her left knee and her leg spasms under his touch. He steadies her, lets his hands rove up along her outer thighs as he kisses his way towards her center.

A soft mewl tumbles from her lips when he darts his tongue out to stroke at the skin at the crux of her thigh, just below the cotton material of her underwear and her hands immediately shoot out to grab his hair again. He loves it, loves that she feels the need to hold on and she chooses to hold onto _him_.

Kate's hips rock forward in an attempt to meet his touch, to guide him towards what she really wants, and he lets her, doesn't pull back or hold her in place. Her still covered sex rolls against his mouth, and he inhales deeply, breathing in the sweet scent of her arousal once more. He opens his mouth and breathes out against her, and the heat of his breath against her wet center has her fingers tightening, scratching at his scalp as she clutches on to his hair.

"Fuck," he can't help but curse, nearly whimpers at the feel of how wet she is against his lips, even through the material of her panties.

"For you," she gasps out, her voice sounding hoarse already. "It's for you."

Kate Beckett telling him she's wet for him, in a voice that begs to be touched is undoubtedly the sexiest thing he's ever heard in his entire life and if he wasn't so keen on tasting her and having her fall apart under the work of his tongue he's almost certain he would have exploded in his pants right then and there.

He looks up and their gazes lock as he pulls down her underwear. Her eyes are wild, darker than he's ever seen them, her face flushed and her teeth are clamped down on her bottom lip. He doesn't look away, doesn't look down even as he finally rids her of her underwear and the corner of her lips quirk up in a shy, yet teasing smile, a single brow lifting in challenge. That's all the permission he needs.

Castle finally lets his eyes trail back down her body until he encounters her bare core, wet and rosy and so ready for him and _god_ , he swears this woman is straight out of his every fantasy – no, screw that, she's far passed anything he could ever imagine-

"Oh fuck, Rick, touch me, please," she breathes, begs for the second time in a manner of minutes and he has to admit that he can't stand the waiting any longer either. His hands move up to cup her ass, squeezes gently as he pulls her forward and he guides one of her thighs over his shoulder for better access.

And then he touches his lips to the apex of her thighs, lays a gentle kiss to her wet lips that tears a ragged sound from her throat and he allows his tongue to travel up the length of her. Her sweet, tangy taste coats his tongue and he moans, sending vibrations through her core and her hips rock against his face, her back arching off the fridge.

"Castle," she moans his name when he circles her clit with his tongue. He starts a slow pattern, stroking along her folds, teasing her and then delving back in to suck at her sensitive nerves. She's vocal, louder than he ever expected and hearing her so uninhibited, so free spurs him on, has him doubling his effort to see her spiral over the edge. He strokes and nips and laves his tongue over every inch of her, gathering up some of the wetness pooling from her center and bringing it up to her clit to tease her.

Castle knows she's close when her fingers clench painfully tight around his hair and her knees start to grow week, his name falling from her lips like a mantra and he grips her hips to hold her up, doesn't stop the piercing rhythm he's set up.

He runs the flat of his tongue against her clit and Kate breaks apart on a final cry, her hips bucking into his face, crushing his mouth and nose against her sex as her heel digs into his back and she continues to cling to his hair.

* * *

 _A/N: Thank you for taking the time to read; I'd love to know what you think! The next chapter will be up on Thursday! - Zoe_

 _Twitter: ZoeKeller_

 _Tumblr: zkalways_


	4. Chapter 4

Holy shit.

She honestly can't remember the last time she came that hard, with her legs turned to jello, her entire body on fire as the piercing wave of her orgasm ripped through her. All she could do was hold onto him for dear life as he sent her body flying over a cliff of pure ecstasy. And he hasn't even been inside her yet.

She's still panting, grateful for the support of his arms around her waist holding her up and the fridge at her back. She doesn't think she would have managed to stay upright if either had been absent.

God, she can't believe that just happened.

She just let Richard Castle eat her out in his kitchen. She's suddenly hit with the urge to see him, to kiss him, to return the favor and make him just as weak from her touch. Castle is still laying soft kisses atop her thighs, her lower abdomen, stoking the flame in her midsection and she pulls him back up to her, urges him back onto his feet with her hands tugging at his ear and the material of his shirt.

And how in the world is he still fully clothed? She needs to remedy that. Stat.

She surges up to capture his lips with hers as soon as he's back to his full height, revels in the taste of herself on his tongue. "You were amazing," he mumbles against her lips, a touch of awe in his voice. "So beautiful," he continues to praise between demanding kisses and she whimpers, his words and his tongue slowly setting her aflame from the inside out, the embers igniting in her bones.

"Kate," he groans into her mouth when she pulls him in closer by the tails of his shirt, sealing her body to his, deliberately dragging her wet center over the bulging evidence of his arousal straining against the confines of his pants. "Bedroom," he bites out, his teeth nipping at her earlobe. "Now."

The commanding tone in his voice has a shiver running up her spine. Castle rarely takes charge, usually happy to let her lead most of the time and she normally likes it that way, but right now, half naked in his kitchen with his erection pressed against her, she's incredibly turned on by the way he allows his primal instincts to take over.

Kate gasps when she feels her feet lift from the ground, his broad hands bracketing her thighs around his waist and she wraps her arms around his neck not to fall. He carries her towards his bedroom and she can't help but chuckle when his steps falter as her fingers begin to unbutton his shirt, her lips following the newly revealed skin with a trail of kisses.

"Beckett," he warns, and she grins at the use of her surname. She knows he probably meant it to be more threatening than it ended up sounding but the breathless quality of his voice tells her she's the one who holds all the power right now. She wants to tease him, to drive him crazy and get under his skin the way he does every single day but she holds back, figures it's probably in both their best interests to ensure that they make it to his bedroom in one piece.

Castle crosses his office in an impressively low number of long strides with her in his arms and lets her legs fall back down to the ground at the foot of his bed, trailing his hands up from her thighs, lifting the material of her shirt-

She swats his hands away and he pouts. Kate traps his upturned bottom lip between her teeth and kisses away his frown.

"You're severely overdressed," she observes, continuing her work on the buttons of his shirt. "Not fair at all, Castle," she teases, her voice sultry, and she isn't disappointed in the effect it has on him.

He holds his breath, his adams apple bobbing when he swallows hard at the work of her deft fingers making their way down his sternum, popping open every button at a painstakingly slow pace, taking her time and mapping every new patch of skin she uncovers with her hands, her lips, her tongue, her teeth.

His fingers coil tightly in the material of her shirt at her waist, needing to hold onto something and _good_ , she thinks. She wants to drive him mad with need, wants him wild and wanton and past the point of any coherent thought. She wants him to experience everything he made her feel.

When she finally has his shirt open, she wastes no time in lifting it passed his shoulders and down the length of his arms, leaving it to fall to the floor at their feet.

Kate gasps when he steals his hands below her shirt, returning the favor, pulling the material from her waist and up the length of her body. His large palms seem to engulf her small frame, and a fresh wave of heat blooms across her skin, following the blazing trail of his hands as they make their way up, molding along every edge and curve. She makes a soft sound she doesn't recognize – she thinks it almost resembles whine - when he lets his pinky finger trace the underside of her breast, but he continues, determined not to get sidetracked by the siren call of her body and actually get the shirt off her this time. She lifts her arms up to help his progress and her shirt quickly joins his on the floor and suddenly she's been away from his mouth for too long, craves the curl of his tongue, the subtle taste of what she thinks is whiskey and something uniquely him.

She surges up and he meets her halfway, his arms branding around her waist and her stomach grazes his, her still covered chest pressed in close. Kate moans at the skin to skin contact, how warm his hands are against her bare flesh, how big and soft and _right_.

She doesn't remember the last time anything has felt so right.

His mouth never strays from her, his kiss deep and languid even as his hands scale up the length of her back until he reaches the clasp of her bra. A very tiny part of her wants to protest, insist that she's still far more uncovered than he is but then she feels the undergarment loosen at her back, one of the straps slipping from her shoulder and all she can think about is how much she wants his hands to move around to her front to cup her breasts.

He's so gentle, so slow and tender and she loves it, loves the way their pace is setting them both on fire, but she _needs_ him. Desire coils tightly in her midsection, and she brings her hands down from around his neck, reaches behind her back until she catches his wrists and guides him exactly where she wants him.

Castle groans at the weight of both her breasts in his palm, breaking away from her mouth on a sharp exhale and he looks down.

"God, Kate," he tweaks her nipples, rolls each of them between his thumb and forefinger and she gasps as sparks of pleasure zip through her, spiking her blood.

"Rick," his name falls from her lips in supplication, her head falling forward, and she bites at his shoulder to keep herself from being embarrassingly loud from the attention he's paying to her breasts.

And fuck, she wants to feel him too. The sudden desperate need to have him begging at the touch of her hands makes itself known and she doesn't resist the temptation. Her fingers quickly move down his naked chest to his pants and his hips jerk forward when she purposefully dips a tad lower than needed to reach his belt buckle and brushes against the tight bulge in his pants.

He makes her feel brave, powerful even, and she cups him, can feel the effect her hand has on him even through two layers of clothing and his hands reflexively squeeze around her breasts, pulling a keening sound from her throat. She makes quick work of his belt, desperate to touch him and hurriedly pushes his pants down his legs.

She doesn't think he expects her hand to move so quickly past the elastic band of his boxers and circle around his pulsing length.

" _Fuck_."

When Kate looks up, she sees his eyes screwed shut in pleasure and she reaches up on her toes until her lips meet his, her kiss smooth and gentle, coaxing his mouth open and when his tongue reaches out to tangle with hers she strokes her hand along his shaft, slow and teasing. His fingers dig into her waist, holding on tight but he allows her to have the reigns, to explore his body like it's her property now, like she can do as she pleases with it.

She doesn't think she's ever been with anyone who's given themselves over to her quite so completely, and certainly not during their first time. She vows not to take it for granted, to treat his body like the treasure it is.

Kate pulls away from his mouth, opening her eyes and waiting until he looks back at her, meets her gaze. His pupils are dilated, emanating pure want and hunger but there's something softer there too. He trusts her.

She doesn't break eye contact as she lets her hand glide up and down his erection at a maddening pace, her thumb swiping over his sensitive tip and twisting slightly as she strokes her way back down. His breathing is shallow, his jaw clenched tightly, and he swallows hard as she works him over expertly, teasing him and building up the pressure at the base of his spine all too quickly.

"Kate you have to stop," he gasps when she squeezes a bit tighter, his hand shooting out to grab her wrist, stilling her movements.

"Don't think you can handle it, Castle?" she counters, arching an eyebrow at him and he groans, leaning down to capture her lips in a fierce kiss.

"I'm pretty sure you're going to kill me if you keep going and I'd really like to make you come a few more times before I die," he explains, the familiar grin she's come to know so well curving along his lips.

Kate leans forward to wipe the smug smile off his face with her lips, because she can, but his kiss is softer than she expected, more reverent and sweet than teasing. "I thought I was going to lose you today. And the thought I – that we never would have-"

He cuts himself off and his words have her stomach churning as the events of the last few hours come back to mind. They almost died – twice in less than forty-eight hours no less – and she couldn't spend another second denying that she didn't want him. It was pure luck that they survived, that she even lived to have the realization. "I know," she says, her hand drifting upward to cup his cheek and brush her thumb along the stubble lining his jaw. "But we have right now."

Castle opens his eyes to look at her. He's always seen far more of her than anyone ever has.

"And after that?" he asks, his voice shy, unsure, and she can see the turmoil in his eyes. "What happens after tonight, Kate?"

This is her fault, she knows it. They never talk about what they are, what they both mean to one another and she's been the queen of avoidance, skirting conversations and layering her words with subtext whenever they do.

No more. She wants to fix it, to wash away the uncertainty in his gaze and reassure him that this means just as much to her as she thinks it means to him.

"I don't know what's going to happen, Castle," she starts but she knows those were the wrong words to start with when his eyes fall from hers in disappointment. "I know I'm going to mess up sometimes, and you probably will too. But I want more than just tonight," she promises, and his gaze shoots up to meet hers once more, a bright flare of hope lifting up his lips in a smile.

"Thank god," he breathes a sigh of relief and a second later his pupils are dilating, his mouth crashing over hers possessively and she lets him take whatever he needs. "God, I want you," he growls, pulling her body close until every part of her is flush with his. Kate whimpers at the direct pressure of his thigh brushing against her clit, but she wants more, wants him, all of him, and the fact that his briefs are still in the way is entirely too frustrating.

She hastily returns to the job she'd begun seconds ago before she got distracted, shoving his boxers down the length of his legs until he stands completely bare before her. He doesn't protest and picks her up off her feet only to deposit her back down onto his king size bed, her back lying on the soft comforter and he drapes himself above her, claiming her mouth and moaning when she twines her legs across his back, driving his lower body into hers.

* * *

His length brushes against her, slides through the slick folds of her sex along her clit and the uninhibited moan that tumbles past her lips nearly has him coming right then and there, but he fights against the powerful current of pleasure that threatens to pull him under.

He lets his head drop forward, his face nestled into the cove of her neck as he struggles to breathe, to slow the pounding of his heart but he knows it's useless. She's ruined him already and he hasn't even been inside her.

And he knows he's especially doomed when he has to stop three words that he knows would have her running scared from falling past his lips.

He loves her. He might not be able to tell her yet, she might not be ready to hear his confession but he's damn well going to do his best to show her.

"Castle," she gasps when he lifts up, shifting the weight of his body onto his hands and it has his shaft moving against her center, producing friction right where she needs it most. Her arms wrap around his neck, fingers tangling in his hair as she holds him close. "Inside," she urges, her voice breathless as her lower body moves against him in a way that has him clenching at her hips. "Please."

Castle shifts his pelvis, moves up slightly, positioning himself at her entrance and the look of pure pleasure and anticipation on her face gives him all the permission he needs. He grinds down and enters her in one swift move.

* * *

 _A/N: Wow, you guys, honestly, I can't thank you enough for all your kind responses! I hope you enjoyed this chapter; the last one will be up on Monday! - Zoe_

 _Twitter: ZoeKeller_

 _Tumblr: zkalways_


	5. Chapter 5

_A/N: Still rated M._

* * *

"God, Kate," he breathes, barely able to form a coherent thought, because the one thing he knows is that he's inside Kate Beckett and he absolutely never wants to leave. "You're so tight."

Kate groans, pushing up with her hips, taking him in deeper, her muscles clenching around him and he can't help the way his lower body drives into her.

 _"_ _Oh yes,_ Castle," she moans at the movement, her fingers tightening in his hair and her nails digging crescent shaped marks into his skin as she holds him to her.

He starts a slow, shallow rhythm, and she picks up quickly, mirroring his movements and undulating her hips in time with his. Her legs are still locked around his waist, her ankles crossed at his lower back in an attempt to stay as close as possible.

One of his hands migrates from beside her head, needing to touch her – even when he's as close to her, as connected as he's ever been – trailing along her arm, the cage of her ribs and down until he reaches her bottom. He marvels at how smooth her skin is, how it feels like silk against his large hands, like satin against his fingertips.

He doesn't expect the heat of her mouth at his jaw, the kiss she presses against his cheek and his rhythm falters slightly at the sweet touch. He feels her lips curve upward against his skin and _god_ , she knows exactly what she's doing to him doesn't she? She's _trying_ to wreck him.

It's working.

Her lips travel up, along his neck and when her teeth scrap against the lobe of his ear his hands squeeze her ass, jerking her hips into his roughly and she mewls, her head falling back into the pillow.

It's got to be the sexiest thing he's ever seen in his life.

Castle tilts his head to capture her lips, nipping at her lower lip in retaliation, driving into her at the same time as his tongue delves into her mouth to tangle with hers and she gives back just as good as she gets.

Her body shifts, one of her legs coming down from around his waist to find leverage against the bed and his world spins as she flips them. He gasps in surprise but also from the change in angle. He's still buried inside her, deep, god, _so deep_ , and he doesn't even know how she did that so smoothly but he's not complaining. Not when her hands take hold of his at her waist and pin them above his head, her fingers threading between his as she leans forward. Heat spears through him at the realization that every single part of their bodies seem to be touching, their legs intertwined, noses bumping in what feels more like eskimo kisses, the way her breasts flatten against his chest as she grinds into him.

 _Fuck_ , he doesn't think he can hold on much longer. The pressure in his abdomen coils and winds tightly as she continues to move above him, her hips rocking and circling, pumping his length and he starts to see stars.

But he's determined not to fall without her, to make sure she's just as close to the precipice as he is because there's no way he's leaving her unsatisfied, not when she's giving herself over to him so completely.

Her ragged breath and the soft high-pitched noises that leave her lips reassure him she isn't very far, though, might only need a little more to push her over the edge. Castle bends his left knee and pushes up into her harder, using the force in his leg as purchase and she chokes on what sounds like his name.

She's so loud, so vocal in her pleasure and it's probably the biggest turn on he's ever experienced. He needs to know what she sounds like when the wave of her orgasm crashes over her, yearns to hear her completely let go, lost in the sea of pleasure they've created together.

Her inner walls clench around him when he continues to plunge into her a bit more forcefully, her fingernails biting into the skin of his knuckles as she holds onto his hands. Their pace turns hurried, frantic, delirious almost and when her chest rises higher he dips his mouth to take her nipple between his teeth.

She keens, slamming down onto him roughly and he can feel her walls begin to flutter around him, right there on the edge of breaking apart for him. He sucks her breast into his mouth, groaning around her at the sweet taste, the smell of cherries that engulfs him and he untangles one of their hands, slips it between them.

She breaks the moment his thumb touches her clit, clamping tight around him and his vision goes blank, a sheet of white behind his eyes at the sound of his name falling from her lips accompanied with a few curses. He spills into her, and pleasure shoots down his spine, lining his every limb from head to toe and he knows with absolute certainty that he's never felt anything quite like this.

Her hand moves from within his to clutch at his neck and he moves his to smooth down the length of her spine, encourages the way her body continues to undulate against him softly, chasing the last waves of her orgasm.

She's breathing hard into his neck, and the warm puffs of air ground him, bring him down from cloud nine, back to the woman in his arms. She isn't moving, isn't crawling off of him in shame or regret but when her head comes up from where it'd been resting at the cove of his neck, he feels his heart stutter, a sharp pinch of fear that this is it, that she's going to leave him and try to pretend this never happened the way they always do.

He expects to see sorrow and remorse in her eyes when her gaze meets his; he isn't prepared for the warmth he finds there instead or the small shy smile she wears. A current of heat washes through him and he can't help the way his lips curl upward to mirror hers.

"That was…" he trails off, doesn't even know how to put it into words.

She pushes upward with her knees and slants her lips over his, hums into his mouth and his hands come up to tangle in her hair.

And, yeah, there's no way his brain is going to function properly to find the right words with the full length of Kate Beckett's body plastered to him, kissing him like she wants to be here, like she's in no hurry to leave, like she might want to stay.

God, he hopes she stays. They really need to talk.

"Extraordinary?" She pants against his lips when they part for air and it takes him a second to understand that she's finishing his sentence from earlier. He's the writer and somehow, she's the one who manages to find the pretty words to describe how absolutely earth-shattering their first round just was.

" _You're_ extraordinary," he counters, and she huffs out a laugh, the skin around her eyes crinkling from her smile and she drops her forehead to rest against his chest.

She's _happy_. He doesn't know if he's ever seen her smile so wide, heard her laugh so freely. And it's because of him, because she's here with him. He knows it's way too soon, completely out of line to be thinking things like this, but he finds himself hoping to be the one to responsible for that smile every day for the rest of his life.

"You're a sap," she says, shaking her head as she looks up at him again.

"Only for you," he grins, and she rolls her eyes, but the rest of her face betrays her; he can tell it's just an act, that she secretly likes his corny lines.

"Mm, we should have done that a long time ago," she whispers, her voice still sultry and sated and he thinks only she could have heat pooling along his insides, yearning for her again so quickly. Her confession makes his heart pound a little faster because it sounds like she might really want this, like she might want to do it _again_ , that this won't be the only time. He knows it's unfair of him to doubt her like this, that she reassured him that they'd be more than a one-night stand only half an hour ago, but he'd feared she'd change her mind after the fact, once the adrenaline and heat of the moment had evaporated.

Kate shifts, moves to lay on her side but she doesn't go far, resting her head on his chest, her arm draped of over his stomach.

They stay like that for a few minutes, quiet and lost in thought. He grazes his fingers along her back, drawing patterns over her skin. He doesn't want to break this bubble, really, he'd be happy to just live in this blissful moment forever, but the questions plaguing his mind are driving him crazy. He's terrified to push too far, to ask for too much and send her running, but he needs this, needs more than words that were spoken moments before they were joined.

"You're thinking really loudly," she murmurs, and he curses himself for being so predictable, so damn needy. Truth be told, if this were any other women he'd probably let it go, but this is Kate and she means more than anyone ever has. It scares the crap out of him because he's fully aware that she could easily crush his heart with one swing if she tried. He doesn't think anyone other than his mother or daughter has ever held so much power over him.

"I know you said you wanted more than just tonight, and I'm so glad, but I just… I need-"

He cuts himself off, has never felt so damn ineloquent, so needy and pathetic, and it's probably a complete turn off for a strong and powerful woman like Kate.

"Rick." The use of his first name falling off her tongue halts his thoughts. She lifts her body off of his and for a second, he panics, thinks he's already driven her away, but then her palm comes to rest against his cheeks and she turns on her side, urging him to do the same to face her. "I know I haven't always been clear, that we don't… talk about this, us, usually. I'm not really any good at using words…" He watches her intently, amazed by this woman who is opening up to him when she sees that he can't, that he's scared.

"I broke up with Josh to be with you. Not just to sleep with you and move on." Her words hit him like a bolt of lightning, strike through him and he can't help the giddy smile that lifts his lips.

"So, not a rebound then?" He asks, though her words have already confirmed as much.

"No. If anything, Josh was a distraction," she admits, shame crossing her features, and she's clearly not proud of it.

"A distraction from what?" He's confused. She had to have known he's always wanted her, that he hasn't been shadowing her for three years now solely for research.

"From… last summer," she mumbles, hiding her face against his chest and, wait-

Last summer?

"What? But you were with Demming."

She sighs, and he can see she's dreading it, that she doesn't really want to tell him.

"I broke up with him before you left," she admits, and his blood runs cold.

Oh, no.

"I was going to come with you to the Hamptons-"

He groans, wishes more than anything that he had a time machine and he could do it all over again.

"Kind of broke my heart when you walked off with your ex-wife." Her words hit hard, a punch to the gut because he _hurt_ her. And for the first time he realizes that he's not the only one risking his heart tonight. She broke things off with her boyfriend to chase after him even after he walked away and didn't give her a chance to explain. She's the one reassuring him, but really, it's not like he's been a saint, he's been just as guilty of talking in subtext and avoiding difficult conversations.

"God, I'm so sorry, Kate. I swear I had no idea. If I'd known, I never would have invited Gina. I was miserable all summer. All I could think about was you."

"Me too," she whispers into his skin, just above his heart and her hands come up to his chest. He can't believe all the time they've missed out on, the long weeks he spent wishing she was there when she could have been had he not been so stupid.

She put her heart out on the line for him, again, even after he'd inadvertently hurt her. It means everything to him, gives him all the proof he needs. She's in this as deep as he is, both doing their best to perfect the balancing act, to keep either of them from falling.

Castle wraps his arms around her and pulls her in close, squeezing her body to his and burying his face in her hair, inhaling the sweet scent of cherries that still lingers there. She comes willingly, snuggles into his embrace and he revels in how well they fit together.

After a beat he pulls back, only far enough to meet her eyes.

"I can't believe you left two of your boyfriends for me," he teases, hoping to lighten the mood.

"Shut up," she says, narrowing her eyes at him and slapping his arm but she laughs. "You gonna make it worth my while?" She asks, teasing, hers eyes hungry and burning with heat, an open invitation if he's ever seen one.

"Oh, I plan to," he growls, surging forward to capture her lips. He plans to make Kate Beckett see stars a few more times before the night is over.

* * *

 _A/N: I can't thank you guys enough for the enthusiasm and all the kind words you've shared for this story. Truly, it means the world to me! This was the final chapter; I hope you've all enjoyed this short fic and again, a big thanks to Anja for the prompt and Chelsea for the cover art. If you ever have any Caskett prompts, feel free to send them to me on here, twitter or tumblr! Until next time! -Zoe_

Twitter: ZoeKeller

Tumblr: zkalways


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